When I began to consider writing this blog, it wasn't so much that I wanted to write the blog so much as I was called to write it. I felt an almost religious compulsion to start the blog and continue to write as much good information on it as I could find.
I did everything I could to avoid setting up the blog, but in the end I found the call to write this blog so powerful that it really swept away all my worries and concerns that there might be some very damaging consequences to authoring this blog somewhere down the line. The work that I do definitely challenges people who are in strong positions of power who could do me a lot of harm. Like many others I am afraid of what they could do to me if I spoke out. Still, I truly felt that God had called me to this work and that nothing I could do would stop me from proceeding with it.
When I researched what blogging programs to use and finally settled on blogger, it was amazing how easily I was able to use the program and design my blogsite. I felt as though I had magic in my fingers because everything that I did just came out right. Somehow, within an amazingly short period of time the concepts I had for the blog in terms of the layout took no time at all to achieve. As a result, I couldn't help but think that my stars were aligned and that some higher power was guiding me.
In some ways I was terrified by writing the blog because doing so really puts you out there as a writer and an artist. You are testing the quality of your work and character with an audience that really makes up its own mind and chooses what to read based on its own tastes.
On the other hand, when I had problems in my family court case, when some action I had taken did not succeed, when I doubted my ability to survive, at least I could say to myself, my work will live on and encourage and strengthen women in my position well beyond the present day. So the blog has given me hope and the courage to continue to move forward and to fight the battle even in my darkest hours.
Still, there is no doubt that I continue to pay a price in terms of the cost to me of the many people on the internet who are angered by my work, who feel I have no business challenging the powerful cabals out there which are taking children away from their fit parents and destroying them financially.
These people contact me regularly with threats, with abusive commentary, and also they attempt to prey upon my good will by sending me fake information about themselves in a ploy to find more information out about me, or to get me to practice law without a license by asking for legal advice.
As everyone knows, since I have posted this on my blog, I am not an attorney. But still people will pretend and take on fake identities hoping to compromise me and ask me for legal advice which I am not qualified to give.
To be honest, I shouldn't really complain about this situation. If I am actually doing my job, I should be making lots of people very angry and uncomfortable. So when I end up receiving a considerable amount of threats and abuse, then it is quite likely I am succeeding in my work, so I should be very satisfied with that.
On the other hand, no one wants to be the focus of verbal abuse. It is as though people are throwing garbage at you and even though you know it is a sign of success to receive it, abusive feedback inevitably bears an emotional price for any blogger. I do feel sad and unhappy when people send me messages like "You bitter old bitch--why don't you get a life!"
I wouldn't be human if messages like that didn't strike me negatively.
It does give me an electric shock when I suddenly realize that the dialogue I was having with a reader I assumed was an abused woman, turns out to actually be from an abusive guy. Those types always like to jump out from behind their guises eventually and go "boo."
Then I get the ones who threaten lawsuits and the like in very official language and accuse me of various forms of inaccuracy and slander.
Luckily for me, I really have worked hard on my blog to make sure that my information is credible and accurate, so I feel pretty confident about that.
Basically, I think I am pretty fair. I am not interested in ruining reputations and spreading scandalous gossip. I am more interested in holding people accountable in a way that is responsible and respectful of the circumstances. What I would really like to do is help solve the problem, if I could, and I do what I can to point out what is the nature of the problem. But I do not like to attack or embarrass individuals if I can avoid it.
There are situations where I can't avoid specifically addressing a particular individual, for example, in the case of Attorney James T. Flaherty where his behavior has been so outrageous and caused harm to so many people. But usually, I try to avoid pointing fingers, and I look to build bridges where I can and help people to see that there is a better way to conduct their business.
Still, even as moderate as I am, or as I perceive myself, as I blogger I have received some very harsh personal attacks. I understand that this is part of the territory and so I have learned to develop a thick skin in this area.
I am always ready to reach out to change hearts and minds even with the most hostile individuals. The bottom line is that these kinds of challenges will not silence me and they will not prevent me from speaking out about the fraud and wrongdoing I see taking place in family court every day here in Connecticut.
Of course, what empowers me to say that are the many readers I have who encourage me and support me every single day of the week. I could never do this work alone--so much arises from the tips I receive, the articles people send to me, and also peoples' stories which they've been willing to share with me and with the DIC reader community. I am very grateful for that help and support every day.
I will continue to blog and do what I can to help, no matter what the obstacles. This blog lets victims of family court here in Connecticut know they are not alone and they are not crazy. No amount of threat is going to stop me from writing it.
